Musical Apostasy?

I am a self-conscious person. What else can I say? If one negative comment is made, I take it personally. Often, I feel inadequate as a person because of numerous people's simple observations about me. I think that my sorest spot is with music. As a child I was insulted twice by my brother asking me to stop singing. Well, I haven't sang since. Honestly, I have a voice. I just don't use it because I feel like doing to would just annoy people or that it'll sound bad for a moment. With saxophone, I was insulted by an upperclassmen(in my old school) telling me that they were better than I would ever be when I was advanced farther than they. I slowed in progress. I came to Bedford and found that I was intimidated. When told to play super quiet because the rest of my section was super loud, I hit the starting moment of my saxophone apostasy. I didn't actually play at all until last year. I'm still very quiet because I'm afraid to play too loud and make a mistake that would be noted. I'm scared to play the piano in public. I can play a lot of songs, but I only choose to show that I know a few at school. When in band, I constantly beat up on myself because I feel like I could always to better and deserve to be scolded for my mistakes. As crazy as it sounds, I pick on my self constantly. Recently, I decided to try and learn oboe. When I hear "Good luck with that." and then laughter I assume that it's something beyond what I'm capable of and don't want to try. I don't want to be disappointed with my lack of musical ability and learning capabilities. Now I can't help but wonder if I even want to be in band. I don't know if it's just me picking on myself or just logic screaming that I'm not capable of keeping up with these great people.